FileFront Forums - FilesNews Issue #01 2016

Welcome to the first edition of FilesNews for 2016, your only source for the truth!

Madness or Genius?

Mad Mikey B, of Parlancia and 30DayChallenges fame, has been spotted in his Dublin basement tinkering with metallic objects. When approached for a comment, Mr. Mikey brushed our reporter off and called us 'vindictive vandals', commencing a tangent on the corruption journalism and our lack of 'integrity'. Our reporter is currently being seen to by a doctor, after a large bottle of guinness was found in his backside.

The Search for Red Menace

The symbol of spam itself, the man of the Red Thread and the movement behind it, is still missing. Mr. Menace hasn't been seen for almost six months now. His last reported sighting was outside an Amsterdam brothel with a suspicious looking figure by his side. At FilesNews, we strive to give you the best, and only the best, news. A private investigator, a detective Black, has been put on the case.

New Legislation from the Games Imperium?

As the consulate meets under the banner of FileTrekker, rumours circulate of a new legislation aimed at cracking down on the underground cat-fur trade going on in the Pub. When approached for a comment, spokesperson Smek had this to say; 'Comment on the legislation to ban you from the sdk is basically wetting his pants in excitement.'

That's all for this issue of FilesNews. And remember; we're your only source for the truth!