Federal Investigators announced today that the get-stupid-quick scheme known as "Spam" has been charged as a fraudulent enterprise. But in a twist on the usual pyramid, this one apparently tricks only the very, very dumb.

Said a Mr. Ponzi, believed to be associated with the investigation, "Usually these kind of crooked outfits are slick enough to entrap a person of at least low-normal intelligence. But this one - Jeez do you have to be an idiot to buy into it."
Agents are expected to begin making arrests just as soon as they can stop laughing.