The Last Charge of the Bottom-Dwellers

[Revenge]

[Barbarian] "Onward, fellow plebs! Charge the great heffilumps!"
[Soldiers rally]
[Barbarian] "Ttttcchhhaaarrrrrgggeeeeeeeeeeeeeeehaaaa!"

[They charge]

Opposite Side of Battlefield

[Captain] "Sir, it looks like they are charging. Shall I bring the ranks to attention?"
[Marshal] "No, Captain. Wait for them to get close, then unleish the Weapon X. They won't know what hit them."
[Captain] "Truly an ingenious plan, sir. Shall I decide the distance before counter offensive?"
[Marshal] "Yes, young man. You have control."
[Captain] "Sir, yes, sir."

[Barbarians getting closer]

[Soldier within Marshal's ranks] "They look pretty angry, wouldn't you say?"
[Soldier next to first soldier] "The angrier, the easier to kill. We'll have some feast tonight!"
[First soldier] "Indeed. Whoever kills the least buys drinks?"
[Second soldier] "Agreed."

[Barbarians coming within firing range]

[Captain] "Just a few seconds now."
[Lieutenant] "Sir, do you wish to charge?"
[Captain] "No, Jones. I wish to use Weapon X. Ready the weapon, at the double!]
[Lieutenant] "But sir, won't that scar them for life?"
[Captain] "Lieutenant, you are not paid to think. These are the Marshal's wishes. Get to it!"
[Lieutenant] "Yes, sir, sorry, sir."

[Barbarians within Weapon X's distance. Screams reverberating from Barbarians]

[Captain] "Is the weapon ready?"
[Lieutenant] "Yes, sir. Shall I fire?"
[Captain] "Yes. You have permission to fire."

[Weapon X is unleished. Boom boxes echo the sound towards the Barbarians]

Waterloo! I was defeated, you won the war,
Waterloo! Promise to love you for ever more,
Waterloo! Couldn't escape if I wanted to,
Waterloo! Knowing my fate is to be with you,
Waterloo! Finally facing my Waterloo.

[Barbarians fall to ground, clutching ears.]

[Marshal] "It is done. Take the victims prisoner, and allow them to drink water - even I can sympathise with them after going through that ordeal."

[SwiftGuard]

[Revenge]

Too true. Mental torture, eh?

[SwiftGuard]

[Revenge]

Woof.

[M!tch]

hmmm, strange but true

[Scientist Dr. Professor]

Perhaps if I knew what you were talking about, I would find it funny.

[Revenge]

What, the dog grammar or the story?