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Old February 25th, 2005   #1
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Default Most Compelling Evidence for Existence of Nessie Yet!

Source: BBC News

At 12:55pm yesterday, Mr. John McFennig of Scotland handed BBC Scotland a photograph which, he says, was taken whilst he was fishing in the Loch Ness.

"I was simply trying t' catch me supper fer t' evening," Mr. McFennig explains. "When all of a sunder, this bloody huge dinosaur creeps up on me from t' Loch. I tell you, it was like summit out of t' f**king Care Bears, I cannae say I've been more f**king terrified in all me f**king life."

Mr. McFennig is a known alcoholic, manic depressive and has been treated in the past for extreme paranoia and hallucinations. He was also sentence to ten years in a mental institution for acts of criminal insanity over three years ago. This has not hindered enthusiasts, however, who were quick to snap up the crudely drawn character and examine it.

"So far I'm yet to find anything that would disprove the authenticity of this photograph," Dr. Frankenstein told BBC News reporter Sophie Barns earlier today. "I've gone over it with a fine-toothed comb. Other than the fact that this appears to be some peculiar felt pen marks scribbled onto a blank sheet of glossy paper, there are no anomalies. I would say that this is genuine. Anyone who disagrees with me will be welcome to assist me in my 'research'."

At that moment Dr. Frankenstein unveiled a hideous monster made from various human body parts and was carted away by the police.

With this discovery our understanding of pre-historic reptiles can potentially be benefited phenomenally, as well as improving our understanding of evolution. Despite the obvious authenticity of this crudely drawn fake that we are simply running to get attention, many scientists are sceptical, and to disprove the whole thing they jumped into the Loch naked to see if anything ate them or not. While nothing ate them, they did die from the freezing cold and local police were forced to dredge their stiff bodies out of the loch.

"I'm gettin' sick and tired of bloody buffoons jumping into the Loch during the winter," Police Constable 'Neo' Anderson told BBC News. "I tell you what, if I was a prehistoric monster living in the loch, I'd have moved out years ago just to get away from these total... f**king... morons. YOU HEAR THAT YOU MOTHER F**KERS?! MORONS! YOU..."

Studies are ongoing at this time, however a copy of this image can be revealed to the public. Scientists say that his is 'indisputable evidence of something living in the Loch Ness other than Barnacle Bill from 24 Cedar Close, Edinburgh'. They also asked us not to publish that address in case criminals took the opportunity to rob his house whilst he was away, but we would like to cover such a story so we published it anyway.

More on this, and how much was stolen from Barnacle Bill's house, as we receive it. The story, I mean. We're not receiving any stolen goods from Barnacle Bill's house. Honest.




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Old February 25th, 2005   #2
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Default Re: Most Compelling Evidence for Existence of Nessie Yet!

Well, if the BBC said so... I'm convinced!

Hail nessie!

"Do not go gentle into that good night,
Old age should burn and rave at close of day;
Rage, rage against the dying of the light."


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Old February 25th, 2005   #3
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Default Re: Most Compelling Evidence for Existence of Nessie Yet!

I :heart: nessie


i want nessie's babies





for tea

What world is this?
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Old February 25th, 2005   #4
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Default Re: Most Compelling Evidence for Existence of Nessie Yet!

no to eat!!!!!1

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Old February 25th, 2005   #5
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Default Re: Most Compelling Evidence for Existence of Nessie Yet!

i knew it, nessie does exist party:

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Old February 25th, 2005   #6
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Default Re: Most Compelling Evidence for Existence of Nessie Yet!

Quote:
Originally Posted by M!tch
I :heart: nessie


i want nessie's babies





for tea
You want to drink nessies babies??

"Do not go gentle into that good night,
Old age should burn and rave at close of day;
Rage, rage against the dying of the light."


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Old February 25th, 2005   #7
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Default Re: Most Compelling Evidence for Existence of Nessie Yet!

In the Disunited Queendom of Not-So-Great Britain and North-Eastern Ireland, 'tea' is commonly used as a word for an evening meal. It's more slang than official language, but that's what happens.


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Old February 25th, 2005   #8
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Default Re: Most Compelling Evidence for Existence of Nessie Yet!

really? i thought it meant sadistic molestation... my bad...

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Old February 25th, 2005   #9
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Default Re: Most Compelling Evidence for Existence of Nessie Yet!

I've seen nessie!

Putting the fun back into fundamentalism.
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Old February 25th, 2005   #10
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Default Re: Most Compelling Evidence for Existence of Nessie Yet!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Mr. Matt
In the Disunited Queendom of Not-So-Great Britain and North-Eastern Ireland, 'tea' is commonly used as a word for an evening meal. It's more slang than official language, but that's what happens.
Ah, so a 'cuppa' is a quick meal? You be téh strange British folk.

"Do not go gentle into that good night,
Old age should burn and rave at close of day;
Rage, rage against the dying of the light."


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