Re: Sex
 

It still amuses me how guys that sleep around are labelled as studs, yet girls who do exactly the same thing, are labelled as sluts or whores. It's either one or the other in regards to the entire subject.

If you're a guy that sleeps around, you have no right to call a girl a slut, a whore, or any other word that relates. If you're a guy that does sleep around, you're doing nothing different from the women you're sleeping with (and those who sleep with you). Why are you any better than them for doing the same thing? Newsflash; you're not.

in regards to the point you made (Lusty Chan) about it being guys that want the sex, and do almost anything to get that sex, I have to disagree. On the whole, girls are just as bad a guys. No gender is any better than the other; if they were, there would be an odd ratio about the whole thing, and you'd have more sexually starved men (or women) roaming around for lack of a sexual partner. The difference between these men and women, is that the men tend to boast about their experiences more than women do; probably due to their self-proclaimed status of being a stud.

There is another subject that I missed earlier (on my initial post) though I believe some people here have commented on it (though not directly). Suffice to say; fuck buddies, or friends with benefits. Anyone here have such a relationship, or has anyone here had such a relationship in the past?

I only ask for curiosity of the complications. Obviously one night stands are just that; sex for one night, and you're probably never going to see that person again. These people who have special friends however, I foresee potential problems here. Sex (in no uncertain terms) is an emotional experience ~ at least to some degree, though it obviously means more to people who are connected. That being said, people who start out as just friends, and then extend that friendship, aren't they (or you) running the risk of getting attracted, thus eventually ending up in a relationship anyway? That, or you end up hating the situation because one of the two develops feelings, and the other doesn't.

Doesn't seem worth the risk?

Re: Sex
 

This has always bugged me as well. Another thing that bugs me is when girls call another girl a "slut" simply because they don't like her, or because they don't get along. Quite immature.

Re: Sex
 

If a guy has sex with 5 girls, he’s “the man” with his buds. A chic does it, she’s a slut. Is this fair? Fuck yea it is, and I’ll explain why. Being “the man” is not easy. Scoring with attractive women is not as easy as it sounds. A lot of effort has to be applied. One must be financially secure, charming, witty, well dressed, attitude, ect. A wide variety of variables all must be in alignment for it to be successful event. How difficult is it for a woman, and I mean ANY woman? Be it a slender fit chic, or a deuce and half with moles and a herpes outbreak? She just has to be there, and willing, someone will invariably come along and hit it.. So yeah, its completely fair. The differences between all of it, go back to the basics. Guys are the accelerators, and women are the brakes. The rules on promiscuity do not apply equally.

edit. As for fuck buddies. Been there and I actually find it preferable to a committed monogamy. Less complications, and the sex is for all intended purposes, consistently enjoyable. Whereas in relationships with boundaries things can become labored and monotonous over time. As for the emotional attachments. Those are subjective to the individual.

Years ago, I was with a girl in a committed relationship and she was really wonderful, or so I thought at the time. Oh and she was a skirt from head to toe. A real catch... Well, one day I had this undeniable suspicious that she was cheating on me, despite no real evidence of it. Pure gut instinct. I had abstained from pursuing interests in mutual female friends under our initial agreement of monogamy that we had from the get go, and this burned me. I felt betrayed. She could, and I wasn't allowed? I would have been amicable to an open relationship with considerations for safety ect, but she never even tried... She wanted more than she was willing to allow of me, fuck that. Well my suspicions, based purely on a gut instinct were enough for me to stand up while watching a movie one night, and order her to her feet, and to the front door. She was 5 months pregnant at the time, and the child was presumably mine. Yet, that didn't matter. I was robbed of my due rights to some "strange" for a long time, and that robbery didn't sit well with me. Especially considering some of the opportunities I passed up over the last year.

So then and there, I kicked her to the curb, figuratively speaking of course, and never once spoke another word to her. Well, almost a decade later, a sheriff showed up at my door in another city and served me with Child Support papers with debt in excess of 10k. I wasn't too surprised or worried. As I knew I would be, the following month I was exonerated thru DNA testing and to this day, as I understand from mutual friends. She never did ascertain who the father was, and the story ends. I'm very thankful I survived the whole ordeal without an incurable std or a child.

Ever single monogamous relationships I've been in, ended poorly, and oddly enough it's the casual one's I still get along with. Then again, maybe I'm just not a people person....

Re: Sex
 

All I will say is that don't bother if they are on psych meds. Having a person who does fun things with your fun stick to wanting their own fun stick in less than a month will turn you off to the idea of girls with mental issues forever.

Re: Sex
 

Love is often defined by its exclusion rather than by what it adds. Sure I want someone I can make a real connection with. But I don't think they're the only one. I'm not that pessimistic about all the other relationships I've got.

The problem is when people make connection and sex mean, more or less, the same thing. I suspect people want to simultaneously say that sex is special and maintain the idea of a relationship based on - 'purer' - values. Thus it's only good sex if it occurs in the context of those purer values -- the myth is born and programmed into you.

It seems unlikely that someone who's connected through interests and aesthetics will experience a world of change by slamming their crotches together. Who knows, it may even fuck it up for them if they go into it having built sex up into the holiest of holies.

Re: Sex
 

We're never going to agree on this, but I will allow you to humour me. :)

Most of these labels I can accept, but a woman isn't really going to care how financially secure a guy is if she is merely spending just the one night with him. How and why is that going to make any difference?

You're right, she does just have to be there at the right time, and if she gets the desired attention, she's off. That is if she's that kind of girl in the first place, otherwise the guy will be shown the door.

Just because a guy can, doesn't mean he should. Whilst it may be an achievement to a particular guy, having managed to bed a particular girl, that sure as hell doesn't make him any better in my eyes, I'm sorry, but if that guy is then going to walk around and call the girl a slut for sleeping with him, he should take a long look in the mirror. He's just slept about too. Same title applies.

This is circumstantial, and based only around the society you grow up in. Guys being the accelerators gives them no more reason to praise themselves for their deeds, and disapprove of the woman.

If men are sleeping around with these woman (which they are), then these guys know that they're sleeping with sluts (by their definition at least). It doesn't make a blind bit of difference to them before the actual 'achievement', only after does their view change. What does that say about the guy in question?

Hold up. You're paying for this child even though you don't actually know whether you're the Dad? That ain't right, surely?

Re: Sex
 

well, im more of the person who sleeps every weekend with another girl, and i do it by my own free will. I tend to get anxious about being in a relationship, maybe for because i am very social and independent and i don't want to be shackled by anyone OR be stuck with just one girl. Could be because i am afterall just 19 (soon 20), and i still need to experience different types of women before i can say which type is the one for me.

ps. The ego-boost of several one night stands is cool.

Re: Sex
 

Guess what it is for me?

YES! After the marriage!

Re: Sex
 

You’re right, poor people always get the best looking chics. Homeless guys too. The fancy car, clothes, ect. This materialistic stuff plays absolutely no role at all…

Trophy wives are myths too? Sexual conquest is the only real conquest of lasting significance. What sells everything we buy? How much T & A must you see before you see the connection? Sex can and does sell, just about everything. Part of that undeniable biological imperative, manipulated, weaponized and marketed. Everything else pales to sex appeal. Before I die, among the few things that will flash before my eyes, there be some very special women with whom I had the privilege of knowing, intimately. Everything else, the homes, cars, sights, travels, ect ect. Not nearly as memorable.

Sure they do, for all of the obvious reasons.

Did you even read the post? I was exonerated thru DNA testing. The child wasn’t mine and the order for child support was rendered null and void. The whole "exonerated" bit. She however, still doesn't know who the father is. Poor girl. I guess she should have been a bit more thrifty with her box.

Re: Sex
 

good replies, very good.

1) Very. True. It can be just as special as you want or WILD as you want, depends very much on how you take the situation. i personally prefer wild, spontaneous and unexpected sex. (you name the situation - shopping mall toilets to friends house or whatever. maybe for the thrill who knows)

2) its great you take it with such attitude. With experience you know what you want and aim for your own needs. im a selfish bastard i know and i got the attitude of "one life, enjoy it" -type of thing.

3) This i've done a couple of times and yes i do sometimes regret it, but hell, they were good.. but one thing i gotta say: even though what happens, (hopefully) both will enjoy this.. sexual intercourse. :lulz:

-Orchid