Whats wrong with this convo?
 

Alright theres this girl I meet online she seems to like me and I like her however when we do meet things become akward from my part and I explained to her that I'm afarid of large crowds.

Please don't laugh at me becuase I get that at school alot I just want to know were I went wrong in this convo becuase I kno I messed up and I don't know were and why so could you please fill me in.

Well heres how our facebook convo went...

Re: Whats wrong with this convo?
 

With respect, she really doesn't seem at all that interested judging by that particular conversation. She doesn't seem to know what she wants either.

Re: Whats wrong with this convo?
 

This might just be me, but I would stop going on about how you are "emotionally confused" if I were you.

Re: Whats wrong with this convo?
 

Use spoiler tags next time. Also, I believe this is more of a General Yib-Yab (Off Topic) topic rather than one for the Pub.

Re: Whats wrong with this convo?
 

You're being bloody pushy considering that it's a girl who, by the sound of things, you barely know. Being like that won't get you anywhere with 99.9% of girls. I would tell you to back off for a bit but to be honest it looks like you've screwed it up too badly for that to make the slightest bit of difference now.

Re: Whats wrong with this convo?
 

Well I put this thread in the pub becuase it is a real life issue I am trying to deal with.

Well I only asked if she wants to go out with me becuase I already went out with her at her school dance even thought that didnt go very well becuase of mistakes on my part. The reason I want to go out with her again is becuase I can sense we have alot in common.

Re: Whats wrong with this convo?
 

To me you sound like your one of those "clingy emo" types in that convo. Regardless of whether that is true or not it seems like she has made up her mind that some time apart is needed.

Re: Whats wrong with this convo?
 

What is a "clingy emo"?

Re: Whats wrong with this convo?
 

Exactly what it sounds like, a clingy emotional person.

Re: Whats wrong with this convo?
 

Nigh on everything

The conversation went bad from the first message. I'll just do this the simple way.

Bad opening. Comes across as needy and a bit pushy. If she cared to tell you why she’d make excuses for herself without you prompting her.
Most people don’t like thinking of relationships as a trade system, if you phrase it in those terms whether it’s true or not it makes them uncomfortable. Besides the subtext here could be read that you just don’t want to seem indebted to her. It’s a really strange thing to say in the context.
When people say ‘can’t’ a lot of the time they really mean ‘won’t.’ If she wanted to go she’d suggest another time for herself.

At this point it’s pretty obvious the answer’s going to be along the lines of, ‘never,’ but she doesn’t want to seem mean.

Yeah make her seem like the bad guy in the situation, she’ll thank you for that.

Of course you make her feel uncomfortable, and if new people make you that nervous as well then she’d stand to be in many more situations that make her uncomfortable if she went out with you on any sort of extended basis.

Leave that sort of excuse, whether it’s true or not, well out of the conversation. People are often happier either with an omission of the truth or a straight out lie, if you can’t do that then relationships are going to be very difficult for you.

If she doesn’t know she doesn’t really like you.




Entirely what she’s trying to avoid since she’s worried saying it to you would make her seem like a bad person.

Mentioning how anti-social you are is a bad move. As is pushing for the truth at this point. When they’re trying to avoid the truth people don’t like to be pushed towards it and insisting on it makes you unlikely to get an answer you want.

If she wanted to talk to you over MSN you wouldn’t be blocked on it, pushing for further access to her after she’s essentially told you she doesn’t care about you very much just comes off as weird.

Are you giving her an order here? Clearly she doesn’t miss talking to you so leave her alone.
Remind her how much her life sucks, she’ll enjoy talking about that.

You can’t work it out at this point? It means she finds you odd but doesn’t have the balls to tell you to get lost. Even asking here is out of place since it indicates you lack the social intelligence to work it out for yourself.

Never ever contradict people’s excuses if you don’t want to throw a spanner in the works.
What she’s your counsellor now to load with your emotional baggage? Don’t see why that’d make you seem like a great person to know to her.

And how many more silly moments is she going to think of when you say that? It just reminds her of the other things you’ve said.

‘Emotionally confused’ aren’t really good words to describe yourself with. Telling someone to tell you something about themselves also comes off as being rather odd, usually information like that is volunteered in answer to a question not surrendered in response to an order.

I doubt she does know what to say to get the sort of response she’s looking for. If she did she’d have done away with all the screwing around and ‘I’m not sure’ and just told you to get lost.


What as? A hooker, a murder victim? Considering the setting it’s not really something you tell a girl you’d like to face them in.
I’m thinking you should leave her the hell alone.