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Adrian Ţepeş July 26th, 2013 12:17 AM

Making fun of poems
 
I've written a few in my lifetime, so if I find them I'll put them on here and you can have a fair go at mine. But first:

The Hippopotamus

"HE broad-backed hippopotamus
Rests on his belly in the mud;
Although he seems so firm to us
He is merely flesh and blood.

Flesh-and-blood is weak and frail,
Susceptible to nervous shock;
While the True Church can never fail
For it is based upon a rock.

The hippo's feeble steps may err
In compassing material ends,
While the True Church need never stir
To gather in its dividends.

The 'potamus can never reach
The mango on the mango-tree;
But fruits of pomegranate and peach
Refresh the Church from over sea.

At mating time the hippo's voice
Betrays inflexions hoarse and odd,
But every week we hear rejoice
The Church, at being one with God.

The hippopotamus's day
Is passed in sleep; at night he hunts;
God works in a mysterious way--
The Church can sleep and feed at once.

I saw the 'potamus take wing
Ascending from the damp savannas,
And quiring angels round him sing
The praise of God, in loud hosannas.

Blood of the Lamb shall wash him clean
And him shall heavenly arms enfold,
Among the saints he shall be seen
Performing on a harp of gold.

He shall be washed as white as snow,
By all the martyr'd virgins kist,
While the True Church remains below
Wrapt in the old miasmal mist."

:rofl:

Lindale July 26th, 2013 12:59 AM

Re: Making fun of poems
 
So, there is this the phenomenon that humans refer to as “modern art.” It is most confusing, and I fear it shall forever remain that way. For example, Jackson Pollack urinates on a canvass and sells it for 15,000 Credits? I do not understand this at all. I swear I will never understand humans.

Adrian Ţepeş July 26th, 2013 01:23 AM

Re: Making fun of poems
 
I consider certain movies and a fair bit of music to be art; however, poems I can't stand for the most part.

Fortune July 26th, 2013 01:29 AM

Re: Making fun of poems
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Master Lindale Mustaparta (Post 5708898)
So, there is this the phenomenon that humans refer to as “modern art.” It is most confusing, and I fear it shall forever remain that way. For example, Jackson Pollack urinates on a canvass and sells it for 15,000 Credits? I do not understand this at all. I swear I will never understand humans.

It is a little known fact that Jackson Pollack's popularity is largely due to the politics of the Cold War. His recognition was essentially sponsored by the CIA in an effort to create the idea that America was 'culturally superior' to the Soviet Union, and for some reason they had to pick the sh*ttiest art they could possibly find to do it with.

Essentially the U.S. government just went around either paying people, or getting into the right circles to say "Hey have you heard about Jackson Pollack; his work is the future!", and the art community was just pretentious and hollow enough to totally buy into it.

I've really pissed some art 'enthusiasts' off by ridiculing Jackson Pollack, and the concept of modern art in general, I'd respond slyly to them, but I feel no need for recognition from people so self-conscious that they have to rape art to find a culture to fit into. Essentially it devalues actual talent and at its core grades how good a piece is on how uniquely it says "F*ck you, I thought of it first", which is a really unfortunate and uniquely capitalist direction for 'art' to go in.

Anyway, a poetry thread sounds interesting. I used to write a lot of poetry but have somewhat fell out of the habit. If I can find my old book of spells, perhaps I'll post some from back in the days of yore.

Edit: Also I'm pretty sure you either just don't understand that poem, or just legitimately don't have any appreciation for poetry; which would lead me to assume yours probably aren't very good. casual assumption.

a casual interpretation

Spoiler:
"HE broad-backed hippopotamus
Rests on his belly in the mud;
Although he seems so firm to us
He is merely flesh and blood."

The concept of Christianity is represented as a stupid but dangerous beast, which although seemingly invincible, is capable of being killed.

Flesh-and-blood is weak and frail,
Susceptible to nervous shock;
While the True Church can never fail
For it is based upon a rock.

My feelings from this are that the modern Christianity and actual fundamentalist Christianity are contrasted. Modern Christianity is just a shell people wear. They still drink and cheat on their wives and look at girls asses and curse and have pre-marital sex, but they think they're a part of something powerful. They attempt to consolidate Christianity with reason and the rights on man, but those things are inevitably contradict, and Christianity will never win.

Fundamentalists Christians don't need any of that; they only believe in the Bible, and unapologetically. Therefore, they cannot be shaken. The 'rock' is a reference to a hymn that is sung in church, if I could remember the specific one at 3:49AM, I'd quote it. I can't.

The hippo's feeble steps may err
In compassing material ends,
While the True Church need never stir
To gather in its dividends.

Christians are willing to betray their religion and their morality in pursuit of wealth. The church doesn't even need to do that, since it exists almost purely to make profit.

The 'potamus can never reach
The mango on the mango-tree;
But fruits of pomegranate and peach
Refresh the Church from over sea.

Not sure how I interpret this one. Perhaps it means that the average Christian will never find the satisfaction that they are looking for in Christianity itself. The church however is always looking for new converts in new and exotic places, because new converts mean new sources of income.

At mating time the hippo's voice
Betrays inflexions hoarse and odd,
But every week we hear rejoice
The Church, at being one with God.

Just another verse about Christians being able to disregard rules in the Bible (In this case of a sexual nature) while still feeling like they are entitled to its assumed benefits.

The hippopotamus's day
Is passed in sleep; at night he hunts;
God works in a mysterious way--
The Church can sleep and feed at once.

I'm pretty sure the hippo bit is just to set up the clever shot at the Church in the latter verse. This is the punchline of the poem, since it basically paints a picture of the Church as a sort of predatory creature that keeps the minds of its followers 'asleep', while feeding off of them in a way that is very easy to understand if you've ever seen an evening of Sunday Church programs.

I saw the 'potamus take wing
Ascending from the damp savannas,
And quiring angels round him sing
The praise of God, in loud hosannas.

Blood of the Lamb shall wash him clean
And him shall heavenly arms enfold,
Among the saints he shall be seen
Performing on a harp of gold.

Both of those lines just seem to be what the average Christian expects to get out of Christianity. They expect to be part of some kind of lame, homecoming parade one day, as all the non-Christians watch them sadly like kids who didn't make the cut. Sounds ridiculous, except Christians really do fantasize like this to one another.

He shall be washed as white as snow,
By all the martyr'd virgins kist,
While the True Church remains below
Wrapt in the old miasmal mist."


This line seems to either continue the fantasy, or imply that the fantasizing Christian is just dead. The line about the True Church in the miasma is interesting enough with the simple definition of a miasma, which is basically a foul air that medieval thinkers theorized caused all disease.

Another deeper and (To me) more interesting interpretation is taking the word miasma in the ancient sense. To the Greeks a miasma was something sort of like a spell, except a spell is a rule enforced by some powerful entity. A miasma is like a wicked entity that enforces its own will until it is done away with, usually by blood sacrifice. In a way that implies that Christianity is a sort of supernatural force in itself, but one that took on a mythology to hide its true intentions.

I remember reading in National Geographic about all these little miasmal writings that ancient Athenians put on items. Like if you were a blacksmith and you had to make a shield for somebody you didn't like, you might carve a little hidden curse on it, hoping to create a negative entity that would lead the shieldbearer to downfall.


Interesting stuff if that is what the poem intended; but that is the entire magic of poetry, you're not supposed to get the same message out of it that someone else does. Good poetry is just vague enough to give you unique interpretations based on what you've experienced in life, but just direct enough that you know what it is about and can talk about it with other people.

Adrian Ţepeş July 26th, 2013 02:09 PM

Re: Making fun of poems
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Fortune (Post 5708901)
Edit: Also I'm pretty sure you either just don't understand that poem

Lulz

Quote:

Originally Posted by Fortune (Post 5708901)
or just legitimately don't have any appreciation for poetry;

Poetry class will do that to you =p

Quote:

Originally Posted by Fortune (Post 5708901)
Interesting stuff if that is what the poem intended; but that is the entire magic of poetry, you're not supposed to get the same message out of it that someone else does. Good poetry is just vague enough to give you unique interpretations based on what you've experienced in life, but just direct enough that you know what it is about and can talk about it with other people.


All of that I'm well aware of and I still don't like it. Everything above can be attributed to other mediums of art; like I said: movies, stories, etc, all of which I prefer to poetry.


Quote:

Originally Posted by Fortune (Post 5708901)
which would lead me to assume yours probably aren't very good. casual assumption.

That was the implication I was going for based on the thread title and the OP.

But just so that I don't sound like an asshole (if such a thing's even possible) I'll give a little bit more info on this. Someone might suspect that I have a particular fondness for music and song, and you'd be right. But aren't songs just poems with music? Yes, and that's one of the reasons why I grew a (maybe-)unhealthy disdain for just written rhymes; they were always said with such banality, and lack of passion it made me feel bored and empty. To me, music and the different tonality and passion gives actual depth to the otherwise empty sayings.

That's my interpretation :beer:

Fortune July 26th, 2013 02:42 PM

Re: Making fun of poems
 
I admit it.

I don't like Lemon Pie, but I don't make threads criticizing it like I'm some kind of pie authority. That isn't to say I don't have the right to do so, I just have better ways to spend my time. Lemon Pie after all, is a positive force in the universe, it greatly pleases people who like Lemon Pie, and leaves others to consume food more to their liking. Lemon Pie ain't never done no one no wrong; why should I become a negative force in the universe and try to outline my disdain for it? That would simply waste valuable time I have and make it clear to others that I'm just a bitter, resentful person who doesn't approve of the appreciation they get out of it.

I'm not even suggesting that that would make me a 'bad' person, I'll be the first to acknowledge that I'm an asshole; but I do everything I do in life in order to either appreciate/utilize the universe, help people appreciate/utilize the universe, aid in the common good and put people in their place whose actions I regard as going against it.

As for the concept of poetry being somewhat 'obsolete' compared to lyrical music; I feel like they serve different, but similar purposes. Should a pencil sketch by Leonardo Da Vinci be appreciated if a painting of the same object also existed? Poetry is simply the meaning of lyricism that gives you your own voice, your own sounds and images to associate with it. If those things don't come to you; don't read poetry.

Nemmerle July 27th, 2013 04:00 PM

Re: Making fun of poems
 

*shruggle*

Honestly a lot of how poetry is taught in school is wrong. You have people reading, in stumbling lines, this really wooden stuff that's got no soul in it. Or, perhaps even worse, performances like this:


=p

That sort of thing just lacks, at least for me, the ability to stir any sort of feeling bar a bit of annoyance. So, I can understand why people don't like poetry, and why they might have a go at it, because it's not just a choice. It's something forced on them - and, generally, in the worst possible form.

Bound to stir up a bit of resentment.

*drums fingers*

Just reading poetry in your head and analysing it in terms of imagery and so on, I suspect, is missing a lot of the point of the exercise. Like reading a musical sheet with some lyrics and then trying to say what the thing means without seeing the different ways the music could change the message. But the same music can be played in a lot of different ways, providing a range of potential meanings to the thing.

A well written, well read poem can be quite entertaining. Fairly hard to run across by accident these days though, I think.

Asheekay August 7th, 2013 09:25 AM

Re: Making fun of poems
 
1 songs are NOT poems with music. It is poetry, but not poems.

2 all poetry doesn't suck (most of it Does, though)

Honour of the one who fled
Was lost in gore of glorious dead
For brave dies one time, they say
And coward dies everyday
For those who bravely weapon wield
And not for those who flee the field

Fortune August 7th, 2013 10:06 AM

Re: Making fun of poems
 
To be fair, most of every art form is god awful.

Probably 93% of all art that ever existed was talentless, copied and/or something a 13 year old could pull off with some practice.

Adrian Ţepeş August 7th, 2013 10:07 AM

Re: Making fun of poems
 
Probably =p

Red Menace August 7th, 2013 08:36 PM

Re: Making fun of poems
 
I took a poetry class in high school and I was apparently bomb ass at it. I just bullshitted the whole thing.

Fortune August 7th, 2013 09:36 PM

Re: Making fun of poems
 
"I'm nothing but legitimate,
I wrote the book on real.
I hunt alligators
when I want a casual meal.

Don't have to pull up my pants
I've got a black belt.
Kick like Bruce Lee so hot
I make the Miami Heat melt.

I'll hit you hard
like an avalanche of burn
I wrestled a bear once,
then wrote a book like Jules Verne.

It was a coloring book,
to teach kids respect
I'm the king around here
You're just a subject"


- Fortune.

Your move, everyone else in the world.

pryidev August 28th, 2013 11:11 PM

Re: Making fun of poems
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Fortune (Post 5710176)
"I'm nothing but legitimate,
I wrote the book on real.
I hunt alligators
when I want a casual meal.

Don't have to pull up my pants
I've got a black belt.
Kick like Bruce Lee so hot
I make the Miami Heat melt.

I'll hit you hard
like an avalanche of burn
I wrestled a bear once,
then wrote a book like Jules Verne.

It was a coloring book,
to teach kids respect
I'm the king around here
You're just a subject"


- Fortune.

Your move, everyone else in the world.


Fortune as your sign after poems....your move is great after your this poem...


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