Re: put on your funny jokes.
 

That one is so funny! ! ! !!

looool

Re: put on your funny jokes.
 

hahah. those jokes... one day my friend kept saying them. drove me nuts.

Re: put on your funny jokes.
 

Your mom drove me nuts.

Re: put on your funny jokes.
 

how did i know some person would go there............................................. ..........

Re: put on your funny jokes.
 

Of course you knew, Im here, dont doubt my power.

Re: put on your funny jokes.
 

this guy talks his buddy into going with him to visit his grandmother on his birthday. so they're sitting on he couch talking and the buddy, not so interested in the conversation, notices a bowl of peanuts on the coffee table. so he asks if he may eat some, grandmother says to have as many as he would like. after some time theyre ready to leave, the friends tells the grandmother thank you for the peanuts. she replied with 'youre welcome, now that i have my new dentures all i can do is suck the chocolate off of them.'

Re: put on your funny jokes.
 

Ugh, thats a gross and funny joke. I can only think of 2 jokes right now...Blonde Ones

What's a blonde's favorite swim style?
The "breast"stroke

(My gym teach kept saying this one) Two blondes get into an argument over which is closer, Florida, or the Moon. One says:
It has to be the moon!
While the other says:
No way, its obviously Florida!
Another blonde walks in, and asks what they are arguing about. After hearing it, she says.
That's easy! Can you see Florida?

Re: put on your funny jokes.
 

yay! Blonde jokes!

50 blondes and 1 brunette are hanging off of a cliff, on a rope only meant to hold 50 people. knowing that one of them must die, or they all will, they are sad. all of the blondes look to the brunette to jump off, since she's out of place. but, the brunette gets an idea and says, "All right, I'll do it".... and what did the blondes do? they applauded...

i once knew a blonde who tried to put M&M's in alphabetical order

what's a blonde with pig tails? a ride with handles...

Re: put on your funny jokes.
 

Who's in charge?

All the organs of the body were having a meeting, trying to decide who
was the one in charge.

"I should be in charge, "said the brain, "Because I run all the body's
systems, so without me nothing would happen".

"I should be in charge" said the blood, "because I circulate oxygen all
over, so without me you'd all waste away."

"I should be in charge, " said the stomach," because I process food and
give all of you energy."

"I should be in charge" said the legs, "because I carry the body wherever
it needs to go."

"I should be in charge" said the eyes, "because I allow the body to see
where it goes."

"I should be in charge, "said the rectum, "Because I'm responsible for
waste removal."

All the other body parts laughed at the rectum and insulted him, so in a
huff, he shut down tight. Within a few days, the brain had a terrible
headache, the stomach was bloated, the legs got wobbly, the eyes got watery
and the blood was toxic. They all decided that the rectum should be the
boss.

The Moral of the story is "The ass is usually in charge."

Re: put on your funny jokes.
 

Car Accident

A woman and a man are involved in a car accident; it's a bad one. Both of their cars are totally demolished but amazingly neither of
them are hurt.

After they crawl out of their cars, the woman says, "So you're a man. That's interesting. I'm a woman. Wow, just look at our cars!
There's nothing left, but we're unhurt. This must be a sign from God that we should meet and be friends and live together in peace
for the rest of our days".

Flattered, the man replies, "Oh yes, I agree with you completely, this must be a sign from God!"

The woman continues, "And look at this, here's another miracle. My car is completely demolished but this bottle of wine didn't
break. Surely God wants us to drink this wine and celebrate our good fortune." Then she hands the bottle to the man.

The man nods his head in agreement, opens it and drinks half the bottle and then hands it back to the woman. The woman takes the
bottle and immediately puts the cap back on, and hands it back to the man.

The man asks, "Aren't you having any?"

The woman replies, "No. I think I'll just wait for the police.... "

MORAL OF THE STORY:

Women are clever, evil bitches. Don't mess with them.
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